19 Parts That Have Opinions About Money

A few years ago I had a friend we'll call Bob.

Bob and I were both wrestling with our relationship with money.

We were profligate spenders. We though we needed the best of everything, even though we knew that the high we felt every time we bought something we thought we had to have, only lasted around twenty-three minutes. We'd both timed it.

Bob used to joke that everything would be perfect in his life the day he was able to purchase a Weed Whacker. But not just any Weed Whacker. The one with the Corinthian Leather trim. (If you don't get this joke, watch this video. It's short.

Then this one. They're short.)

Money would solve all my problems, right?

I knew my life would be perfect when I bought most of the clothes and jewelry featured in the Sundance clothing catalog. Wearing those clothes would signal that I was a Cool, Western, Hippie Chick. So, all my problems would disappear when I morphed into that woman.

I didn't understand the Weed Whacker allure, but I sure understood wanting to look like the CWH Chick.

The part of me that owned my spending was Sam Spender.

You might have a part of him in you.

Or you might have his sister, Patty Pauper, who never buys anything unless it's on sale. If it's in a pile on the floor with a couple shoe prints on it, all the better. Or Rachel Righteous, who never buys anything new, ever. Or Larry Label, who only buys stuff with the brand logos on the outside of the clothes. Maybe you have a Ralph-Refuse-to-Make-Money-No-Matter-What, so you never have to worry about spending.

Money can't give our lives meaning

There's nothing inherently wrong or right about buying everything a specific catalog sells. Nor buying everything used, or not buying anything unless it's on sale, or wearing your favorite logos plastered on your body. It's tougher when you have a part that doesn't want to earn at all.

Where I get into serious trouble is when I buy things (or don't buy things); earn, or don't earn a certain amount of money, and make any of that mean something about me.

The Sundance catalog, the Weed Whacker store, Goodwill, your local resale store…it came as a surprise to me that none of them sells self-worth. Once I try to buy self-worth, (or self-righteousness, or self-love or self-acceptance or any other feeling), my relationship with money goes in the tank.

Do you have any of these voices in your head? (Don't worry, it's normal).

Instead of trying to beat them to death, or letting them run riot through your life, would you like to make friends? Would you like to have a peaceful relationship with money that leaves you free to work, earn, make; be who you are?

A tool to help you make peace with money

You can make a start on the friendship by having a written conversation with a part of you that has opinions about money. Start by asking these questions:

What is your name?
What is your purpose?
What do you want me to know?
Is there anything else?

Or email me and we'll set up a short appointment to talk to the part of you with strong opinions about money that may have taken control of your financial well-being.

Why is this important?

Because whatever stays unconscious runs your life.